Why men have affairs?
Speak about a loaded topic that no one wants to chat about, that’s it. Funny thing, affairs have been going on since the beginning of the world. Affairs can be burdened with evils, cause sadness, and other troubles. In addition you should wrap your brain around all the other issues, there’s that truth and openness issue, funds, age difference, faith background, shame, and on and on. I suppose there will be some strong opinions about some of this.
For the purpose of this post I shall identify an affair as a long term, maybe decades long relationship of a sexual nature between two people of whom one or both are married to other wives/husbands, discreet wives dating.
Why do men have affairs? There are as many reasons as there are people seeking affairs. I suppose mostly though it is only the human condition, the need for care, belonging, to be wanted and cared for, the caring for others and wanting to be loved and loved. Here are a few reasons I have run across.
Physically we as humans are all sexual creatures. Nature has us set up to reproduce, to have sex. Sex is pleasant and fun, and sex makes us get away the world for a short period of time. This euphoria exists for whatever amount of time we are able to keep the adrenalin levels elevated enough. Someone are able to turn the craving on and off, some are good at controlling it and others are so-so at best. But we all have it, young and elder, able bodied and not so able. It is the Human condition. For some of us it is the sex act itself that drives us. For some of us it is the excitement of the chase. For some of us it is the seduction, for some it is the caring for another individual, for some it is the wish to be appreciatedloved, for some it is the total romance thing. These desires and yearnings can be so strong they prevail over the taboos people has erected against extramarital affairs. For lots of people the yearnings will overcome their worries and make them risk the rage of not only their family, but society also. So why, what is the catalyst?
Sex Addicts, possibly some of us are. Sex is very good, better then drugs, a natural high. If you are in this group of biologically obsessed sex addicts and can find away to have sex and not wound your relatives or anyone else? You will need to lessen the risk you are taking. If you have the attitude that a good affair is one that is beneficial to all, then good luck.
No love at home, or no romance. I suppose this is the largest cluster, very big really. There are many couples whose marital relationships is over, except they feel happy in the manner they exist, and upsetting the extended families is not on their list of things they wish to do. You love your other half but there is no romance. Then there are the children to consider. Your money are so tangled. You need the medical insurance, and so on. There are a lot of reasons to stay jointly besides love and sex.
Physical reasons, there are some people who can not have sex. They have physical reasons that prevent them implementing the sex performance, at least not with their othere half. An extra-marital affair occasionally solves the problem while keeping the marriage uharmed.
Neglect, sadly this is a frequent reason I fear. One or the other, generally the man is sexually neglecting his spouse for a multitude of reasons. As a male I truly am thankful to you guys neglecting your wives and making them accessible to us men of romance, making them “hot milfs” Though I still think it is despicable that you are neglectful. Then there is the spouse who is neglectful until the wife or husband has an affair, then they condemn them for doing so, when they where the catalyst. Those who neglect, then condemn, are not only neglectful, but evil.
Something is just omitted in the marriage, I can not put my finger on it, but its not there. Perhaps its romance that is missing, could be it is a shortage of love, could be compassion is not here, could be it is the closeness, maybe neglect. Maybe we have just grown separately, our common concerns diverged. Maybe it is that what I want, and what I want to do the rest of my life, is conflicting of what you want. Maybe I just do not know what I want from the marriage anymore. Maybe, just maybe I miss that emotion that when I am with you, it just feels right.
The major reason people give is, they search for the passion that is missing and so very much longed for.
There are other reasons, the feeling of power, to escape, for financial gain, for vengeance and so on. I am sure there are more reasons why people have affairs then these. I only stop because if this gets too long no one will read it.
Tags: affairs, Dating, dating married people, extramarital affairs, Marriage, married dating, seeking an affair